Make the phone fucking work.

Here's a pretty big improvement I think you could make, Apple:

Make the phone fucking work.

True story: I was calling a fellow iPhone user and it took us three attempts to finally connect.

I agree with Mr. Summer about a lot of his simple little ways to fix the iPhone... a battery app would be very useful... however, I would argue that making the phone fucking work would be near the top of this list... unless I bought the phone in an effort to track it's battery life.

Apple is lucky PapiJump exists... or else I'd be bitching a lot more.

iPod Brain reading functionality feature

The iPhone has done a great job letting me combine my music and phone devices into one nice handy appliance. It has also made it so easy to skip to the next song with the nice headphones that come with it, letting me skip around in my music without pulling out the iPhone.

However, this has spoiled me and now I want more.

Once when my headphones broke, I was so spoiled by not ever having to take out the device to change songs that if an unfortunate song came singing in my ears I would refuse to change it because that meant a modicum of effort. This was how I listened to Vitamin C's graduation song 7 times in the last month.

Furthermore, sometimes I'll have it on shuffle but I know the specific song I want to listen to. I REFUSE to take out the iPhone so I just click away at my headphones until I either find it or give up and settle on something else... usually Vitamin C's graduation song.

Apple... please give the iPod app in your phone the ability to read my thoughts so I never have to go through this again.

That is all.

Free Will Smith ringtones

I want these included. I want to purchase an iPhone (or in my case re-purchase an iPhone) and have them ask which of the following songs I would like to be my ringtone:

• MiB
• Miami
• Wild Wild West
• Just The Two of Us
• Getting Jiggy With It
• Fresh Prince of Bel Air Theme Song

I then think it would be beneficial for Apple to strike a deal with the superstar in terms of making some new ringtones specifically referencing the iPhone. One would not have any lyrics but just the weird noises Will makes before he starts singing, like in Miami... it would go like this:

Uh... uh-huh...
uh, uh.
Y'all hear that? Y'all hear that?
Your phone is ringing... your phone is ringing y'all.
uh-HA uh-HA!
Your iPhone!
Go see pursuit of happyness.
Yeah.

Hearing these on a daily basis would improve Apple stock ten fold.

If Newsweek can do it...

I can do it.

Today Nick Summers wrote an article touting 10 ways to improve the iPhone... including less buttons to move around mail, showing the weather on the home screen, including a character count for instant messages and including an app to help Nick Summers get laid.

You can read it by clicking here.

If Nick Summers can write about ways to improve the iPhone, then I want to too!

Here are MY simple ways to improve the iPhone.